She Likes to Watch

What happens on Halloween? Anything, apparently

Mere words cannot describe the wonder of this video clip.

It’s fantastic. Scrumptious. Delightfully cheesy.

Above, Tim Curry sings “Anything Can Happen on Halloween” in a very ’80s TV special called “The Worst Witch.”

As you might recall from hazy memories of 1986, “The Worst Witch” starred Fairuza Balk as a problem-prone girl at a prestigious “witch academy.” Diana Rigg played one of the pointy-hatted teachers, while Charlotte Rae (Mrs. Garrett from “Diff’rent Strokes” appeared as another.

But the true star was Big Daddy Wiz himself — Tim Curry.

Curry — seen here about a decade after he donned fishnets and heels to play Frank N. Furter — is simply fabulous as The Grand Wizard, a fellow with a flair for rainbow-colored capes and synth-heavy musical numbers. And he can fly!

His song is made even better by vintage special effects, apparently crafted by a dedicated 15-year-old with access to a computer and a blue screen.

Jill Murphy’s “Worst Witch” series of children’s books both the 1986 special and a television series, which ran for five seasons starting in 1998. In my opinion, however, neither show — however popular — could top Curry’s singular performance.

Now, has anyone seen my tambourine?

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Feeling nostalgic? You can watch “The Worst Witch” and other Halloween specials on YouTube.com for free.

• Charlie Brown and Linus experience the first pangs of childhood disillusionment in “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.”

• Dracula (Judd Hirsch!) and his fellow monsters try to regain their frightening image in “The Halloween That Almost Wasn’t.”

• Meanwhile, Garfield and Odie set out in search of “candy, candy, candy” in “Garfield’s Halloween Adventure.”

Happy Halloween!

“The Rocky Horror Picture Show”: Give yourself over to absolute pleasure

Plenty of movies have fervent followings.

“Star Wars” has spawned multiple movies, television series and novels, conventions and costume contests. Dudes dedicated to “The Big Lebowski” gather yearly to bowl and drink White Russians. There are cults of personality dedicated to the “Evil Dead” movies, “Brazil,” “Heavy Metal” and “Mommie Dearest.”

“The Rocky Horror Picture Show” has to be the only cult classic that requires its fans to strip down to their underwear, shout one-liners and toss toast at the movie screen. Yet, somehow, it’s inspired an international craze.

Some theaters have become legendary for their “Rocky Horror” screenings, such as Portland’s Clinton Street Theater.

Locally, Big Purple Onion Productions presents a live “Rocky” show every month — complete with pirates, cowboys and other delights. (Imagine your funniest, most outgoing friends lipsynching to one of the zaniest movies imaginable — in costume, of course! It’s homegrown fun in an intimate setting, right here in San Luis Obispo.)

Born as a British stage musical in 1973, “Rocky Horror” inspired midnight movie mania two years later with a fantastic film version.

Barry Bostwick and Susan Sarandon star as Brad and Janet, a newly engaged couple who find themselves stranded at night in a torrential downpour. They seek shelter in the nearest dwelling, a castle inhabited by mad scientist Frank-N- Furter (Tim Curry) and his demented staff.

As you might imagine, Brad and Janet are in for a wild night.

“Rocky’s” plot borrows elements from “Frankenstein” and other B-movie classics, mixing cabaret, rock ‘n roll and a wacky sense of humor with counter-culture issues like transvestism, extraterrestrial life and sexual awakening. Hey, everybody! It’s “Time Warp” time!

“The Rocky Horror Picture Show” will be screened tonight at 7:30 p.m. at the Fremont movie theater, 1025 Monterey St. in San Luis Obispo. Tickets are $7.50.

Since “Rocky” fans tend to be a rambunctious bunch, theater management has a few ground rules: No rice, toast or hot dogs. No squirt guns or spray bottles. No lighters. (Would you want to mop up cold hot dogs or try to scrub stains out of a movie screen? No. You would not.)

Costumes and other props, such as newspapers, noisemakers, flashlights and rubber gloves, are encouraged.

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MTV’s plans to remake “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” have apparently been slammed by all those involved with the original.

Show creator Richard O’Brien, who appears in the 1975 film as Riff Raff, says he won’t be involved with any remakes. Barry Bostwick called a remake “a waste of money” and Susan Sarandon simply doesn’t see the point of rebooting such a “charming … interesting” film.

Nonetheless, a “Rocky Horror” reboot is currently in the works. At least one site, imdb.com, reports the release date as 2010.

Just say no to remakes of “Plan 9,” “Rocky Horror Picture Show”

In this age of rampant remakes and repeat sequels, it seems that there’s nothing sacred anymore.

Moviedom’s morons have put a 21st century spin on “Death Race 2000,” “Omega Man,” “Journey to the Center of the Earth,” even “Rollerball” (with inline skates, natch).

Hollywood’s redux of “The Day The Earth Stood Still” comes out in theaters Dec. 12. Revamping one of science fiction’s coolest classics? With Keanu Reeves?!? C’mon, guys!

Meanwhile, there are plans to remake “Plan 9 From Outer Space” and “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”. Good gravy! There’s no way any modern version could ever match those hilarious kitschfests.

It’s enough to make a cinephile scream. Many do.

The world of sequels is no better, with second, third or fourth editions of “Transformers” and “The Fast and the Furious” in the works. (Okay, I’m actually looking forward to “Tron 2.”)

My favorite nerdporium, io9.com, has compiled a list of movie sequels that should never be made — starting with the long-rumored “Blade Runner 2″ Electric Boogaloo.” Personally, if anyone tries to make “12 Monkeys, Part Deux,” I’m going to write my congressman.