She Likes to Watch

The last woman in America to see “Sex and the City: The Movie” weighs in

There is sex in “Sex and the City: The Movie,” and plenty of it.

Nudity abounds, from Miranda’s pale, freckle-flecked breasts to the bouncing buttocks and bosoms of Samantha’s naughty neighbors. We see much of Samantha’s famous cleavage, Carrie’s muscular stems and Charlotte’s taut tummy. There’s even a shadowy male organ, courtesy of the aforementioned next-door hottie.

Not bad for a show that hit the airwaves a decade ago.

Although the characters are older and, one would hope, wiser, “Sex and the City” plays like a thrill-filled season finale. There are shocking reveals, touchy-feely gabfests. Every woman in the film gets her Big Moment (or, in Carrie’s case, her Mr. Big moments).

Each scene fades black in a way that whispers “commercial break.”

Most importantly, the big-screen version of “Sex” has all the elements that made the HBO series such girly fun: the fashion, the shoes, the bedroom talk. (A cameo by “Dreamgirls” star Jennifer Hudson is particularly fun.)

It may be the made-for-TV format, however, that makes “Sex” ultimately forgettable.

Most of the movie’s biggest moments cruise by at breakneck speed. If growing up is the point of the movie — marriage, fidelity, children and all those thorny adult issues — why aren’t we allowed to watch the characters grow?

Instead we get two back-to-back episodes, glued together with occasionally jokey writing and a wandering script.

Also missing from the equation is New York City itself. Although “Sex” gives us a few glances of New York landmarks and carefully cordoned-off streets, the cast seems to spend much its time on soundstages or in thinly disguised California (Mexico? Ha!).

Where’s the grit? The heartbreak? All we get is bare boobs and a poop joke.

No matter how fabulous the gals look in their designer dresses and Louis Vuitton purses, “Sex” just doesn’t seem sexy enough to me.

***

“Sex and the City: The Movie” is currently showing at Downtown Centre Cinema in San Luis Obispo, Regal Cinemas in Arroyo Grande and Park Cinemas in Paso Robles.

***

Photo courtesy of MovieWeb.com.

Tomorrow, Bruce, Dana and Wes Brown–the famed filmmakers of numerous surf movies from “The Endless Summer” to the current “Chasing Dora”–will be at the Fremont theatre for the film festival’s surf night.
I feel a slight connection to the family’s films so I’ll be in the audience.
Growing up in San Diego, I began surfing in junior high with my other pre-teen girlfriends. We weren’t great — or even close to that — but we could stand up, go down the line and turn our neon-colored boards a bit.
My friends and I enjoyed hanging out in our bikinis more than searching for big waves. Our ideal wave was about 3 feet high and was ‘slow and crumbly,’ as we liked to describe it. To some surfers, that’s a wave they don’t bother to surf.
But we were among the generation of new female surfers — there were few of us and people noticed when we paddled out. At least we were out there.
When the Browns released “The Endless Summer 2,” my friends and I got a special invite to a premiere showing. There wasn’t much of a red carpet, but we wore our most surfer-like outfits and enjoyed every moment of it.
We laughed at the jokes in the movies and felt like we understood the wipeouts. We developed crushes on the movie’s lead surfers, Wingnut (who will be here Thursday) and Pat O’Connell.
I also developed a huge respect and admiration for the Browns, who make thoughtful and inspiring movies over and over again.
So, I’ll be in the audience Thursday night to enjoy two movies about surfers and to reminisce about the good ol’ days, when I was one of them.
There are a few tickets left for Surf Night — a red carpet event with screenings of “Chasing Dora” and “Step into Liquid.” It starts at 7 p.m. — visit the film festival headquarters at 861 Palm St. in San Luis Obispo or call 546-3456. Tickets are $25 or $20 for pass holders.
–Dawn R.