Okay, I’ll admit, there are more important things in the world than football. But football on Thanksgiving is still pretty important because without it, we might actually have to talk to weird family members we manage to avoid the rest of the year.
But here’s the thing: Every year, we’re forced to watch the crappy Detroit Lions play on Thanksgiving. And, frankly, blowouts make it hard to avoid talking to your family.
I suppose it’s tradition that the Lions play on Thanksgiving. But who cares about tradition when a team is 0-11 facing a team (The Titans) that’s 10-1? On what is surely a huge ratings day, you’d think the NFL would end this silly tradition of having the roar-less Lions play on turkey day.
Let’s look at the Lions for a second. First of all, they haven’t had a winning season since 2000, when they were a whopping 9-7. Since then, they’ve amassed a 31-92 record. During the last four seasons, they’ve lost on Thanksgiving by an average margin of 20 points.
This year should be especially good since the Lions are winless in 11 attempts.
These guys would be better off with George Plimpton and Marvin Gaye in uniform. In fact, I submit that the biggest turkey at Ford Stadium will be the person who actually paid money to see the Lions get declawed on national TV.
My prediction: Titans 48, Lions 9.
After that drubbing, it will be a thrill to watch the 2-9 Seahawks play the second game of the day. Good thing the NFL added a third game in 2006. At least one matchup will feature two teams .500 or better.
Snooze. If I were in the Midwest, I’d have my brother whip out his VHS copy of “The Superbowl Shuffle.” Oh well, at least John Madden will entertain us.
Posted on November 27th, 2008 by Pat
Filed under: The World According to Pat
Sounds like the perfect game to ignore while you turn the conversation to more pleasant things, like religion, politics and environmental terrorism.