Nov 03

Darkness Washed Over the Dude

moon.jpgWelcome to the Dark Ages.

That’s right, we’ve changed our clocks to “fall back,” which means, basically, the next several months of our lives will be spent in the dark, like bats. Or possums. Or bushbabies.

I’m sorry I sound like such a downer, but come on — who likes to drive home from work in the dark?

Is this why bears hibernate all winter?

But I guess I’m biased because, you see, I like sunlight. In fact, if I don’t get enough of it, I wilt like a neglected spider plant. And then I make weird noises that sound like: “I NEED MORE SUN!”

But it’s not just me. There are many good reasons to encourage more daylight.

Did you know that there are fewer fatal accidents during the daylight? It’s true — people don’t know how to drive in the dark.

And did you know that more daylight is better for the economy? Yup. When people see sun, they’re like, “Man — I gotta BUY STUFF!”

Wait — I’m not done. Did you know that darkness is a real bummer? Mmmm-hmm. It’s called seasonal affective disorder. Or, simply, the winter blues. And you know it’s hitting you when you look out your window, see absolutely nothing because it’s too dark and proclaim: “I hate this.”

So on the eve of a very important election, I say forget all this talk of war, taxes and Wall Street. Let’s go with the candidate who can promise us more sunlight.

You want my vote? Then how about proposing we spring forward now? And not just a crummy hour. I want to live, baby. Make it three hours.

 Who cares if it’s dark until 10 a.m.? We’ll be at work.

For more Daylight Savings Time bloggery, check out Dave Middlecamp’s entry on San Luis Obispo at night.

And, finally, have you voted for your favorite fake campaign attack ad yet? Check out the latest Grudge Match between myself and my (evil) nemesis, Danny. I don’t want to tell you how to vote or anything, but vote for me and good fortune will come your way*.

* Or not

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